No matter what you weigh, there is nothing basically wrong with you

I still am surprised at how often the issue of weight comes up in conversations with mostly thin people. I used to take it personally and thought it was a hint to get me to do something about my weight. Of course, if slim people are worried about weight, surely I should be too.

But to be absolutely honest: I find that I do not have the same pull towards weight loss that I have for example towards further studies. There is no question in my mind that I will someday wear that red toga. And I am willing to spend money and time to achieve this goal.

I can not say the same about weight loss. I can not say with absolute certainty that I will one day weigh that elusive number that the charts prescribes for someone of my “shortness”. And spending time and money towards that goal… well, I find it just as easy to spend time and money on things that are not congruent with this goal. Cake, chocolates, biscuits, chips, if you must know.

The only thing motivating me towards weight loss, is to not have to see a big image of myself in a mirror or on a photograph. But this is more like “pushing away from” the big image than a “pulling towards” the slimmer version of myself.

I have a suspicion that “pulling towards” is more powerful than “pushing away from”. Because, hey, I don’t have to look at myself when exercising in a room with mirrors… and I can just ignore “You’ve been tagged” messages…

If I really want to get to that so-called ideal weight, I’ll have to reframe this issue into a “pulling towards” motivator. But till I find it, I feel comforted by Martha Beck’s words (in The 4-day win):

no matter what you weigh, there is nothing basically wrong with you

But mind you, she also says:

Losing weight and keeping it off requires that you live an unusually authentic, fulfilling life.

Scary stuff, linking an unusually authentic, fulfilling life with weight. And here I was, thinking I was doing rather OK except for my weight!


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